Monthly Archives: September 2006

Change that blahblah, Part Dos

I know, I know, you’ve been waiting with bated breath since the last post for the continuation of this series. I won’t make you wait any longer. (I wonder if this “Change that oil every 3000 miles” post will turn into a THREE part series?)

So, let’s start with the generic theme of ‘People with issues’. Like the man at the very beginning and ending of the movie Pretty Woman who says “What’s your sign? Everybody has a sign!”, I think that everybody has at least one issue. Whether or not it turns them into a non-productive part of society is a different story. In any case, I have recently noticed that instead of the younger generations seeming to have major issues, its the older generations that are shocking me with the things they choose to do. Mind you, I am not making a sweeping generalization (gotta love redundancy) about generations, I’m talking about specific people in my extended life. I will give you two examples of what I mean. To make it easier to understand, I will use names, but the names have been changed to protect the semi-innocent, of course.

The first is an older person in my family, who shall be known as “Henrietta”. Henrietta is a mother figure to “Scout”. Scout has another mother figure in her life, “Camilla”. Scout and Camilla get along just fine. Scout truly looks at Henrietta as her mother. Major difference. Henrietta, for some strange reason, feels that Scout likes Camilla more than Scout likes Henrietta. In all honesty, this is not true. Scout respects Camilla, but truly loves Henrietta. So, recently (over the past year or so), Henrietta has “teased” Scout about wanting to be with Camilla more than her, but as time has gone on, the teasing has gotten more and more kind of mean. Scout is in serious emotional dilemma about the whole thing, but over the past few months has gotten a little ticked off about the whole thing. The past few family events that have had both Henrietta and Camilla at Scout’s house, Henrietta has left Scout’s house without saying goodbye. This makes me mad, because it really hurts Scout’s feelings. My take: when we become of octogenarian age we clearly revert to junior high childishness. I hate it because it makes me feel like Henrietta is pulling a “No one is paying attention to me, so I’m going to leave and see if anyone notices.” I don’t want to feel this way about Henrietta, because I really like her, but WTF?

On to example number two: “Odette,” a septuagenarian, and her daughter “Lola”. Lola tries hard to be the friend that Odette wants her to be. Lola, on the other hand, really just wants some respect as an adult from Odette instead of being treated like a teenager (which by the way, she is NOT). Odette likes to give Lola the third degree on everything from what she bought at the grocery store and why to how come you don’t want me to come visit you for three weeks straight. Lola’s biggest complaint about Odette is that Odette always says to her “How many people did you tell before me?” Um, as if that matters? Be freaking happy for Lola, for Pete’s sake, instead of turning every good thing that happens to Lola into a ‘Poor Odette’ thing.

OK, I think I’m done rambling about people with issues, but its nearly 1130 at night right now and I have to get up in an hour or two to nurse the Littlest Peanut. The rest of my blogging will have to wait for Part Tres tomorrow…

Change that oil every 3000 miles!*

*I preface this preface to tell you that this title means nothing in particular, it was just something I thought of while typing up my post. I could have named this post “The goggles, they do nothing!” but decided to save that for some other time. I also could have used the titles “Mindless rambles”, “Thoughts of a poli sci major while watching silly people on CNN”, or even “Are you sure you want to read this?” Alas, “Change that oil every 3000 miles!” won out.

I preface this post with a pre-blurb stating that I may not have time to finish this post the way that I want to if “The Littlest Peanut” of the house wakes up from her nap. But unlike some people (who make pre-blurbs such as this fashionable) who have a lot to post, I will post whatever I get done before the six week old siren calls. Yeah, Liss, I couldn’t resist the callout on your latest post (made possible by me and another troublemaker ganging up on her)!

So this post is definitely going to be a mishmash of thoughts that I’ve had throughout the day, and of course, feel the need to blather on about to you crazy kooks. Dare I say welcome to the ramblings of a stay at home mom who is rather addicted to CNN and the local headlines? Ah, heck, you guys can hack it: ¡Recepción a mi mente torcida, mis amigos!

Today while Michael was at school, I spent most of my time on the phone with the previously mentioned troublemaker. I must admit, its nice to have someone to ‘hang out’ with during the day again, but Lisa, I will definitely be happy for you when you get a new job. Even if it does give me more abandonment and rejection issues. Speaking of such issues, Liss…I would like to officially thank you for giving me additional doses of these issues today while you decide to go on a business trip instead of being with me. Perhaps I should truly direct my thanks towards the Storming Rhinoceros? Anyway, hope you have a good trip, even if I do need therapy because of it, LOL.

So, today I was watching President Bush meet with Palestinian leader Abbas (front row thanks to CNN), and I was reminded of thoughts I had as poli sci major in college about the control that interpreters have over politics. What if they tell something wrong or put inflection on wrong word, etc. I mean, sure, we think they were saying nice things to each other, but maybe they were actually telling each other that they enjoy goats when their wives are out of town? They sure smiled like it…SMILED, not SMELLED!! LOL Then while watching Venezuala’s Chavez speak to reporters, I wondered-who is the chic who keeps getting up and whispering in his ear? Its freaking annoying. And by the way, if he thinks he’s the only one that thinks Bush is the devil, he’s probably not up on current events. I doubt he’s alone. Oh, and accusing Washington of being all about “domination and exploitation”…um, isn’t that what the American dream boils down to half the time? LOL By the way, I like those little boxes they put on their ears so they can understand what the reporters are saying. Very fashionable, Señor Chavez. And my last political blurb of the day. Lisa, talk about synchronicity…weren’t we just talking about votes not counting? Add this to my list of reasons.

Ok, the ‘nut is awake, so I have to go for now, but rest assured that I have much more to add. Here is a preview for you:
-People with issues
-Reasons to have your back to the wall
-A Starbucks Character: En Fuego Man
-Random thoughts about the way things are in the boonies
-Favorite commercials
-Why I love wireless cell phone earpieces

And now for a brief interlude. I will return as soon as I can. Sing with me now:

“Seems like the wrath of the gods got a punch in the nose and it started to flow, I think I might be sinking! Throw me a line, if I reach it in time, I’ll meet you up there where the path runs straight and high.” (Zep, Going to California)

Weigh anchor or I’ll give you a taste of the cap’n’s daughter!

Yes, that’s right! Today is Talk Like A Pirate Day! ARRR!!! So, ahoy there me hearties! Or as Liss likes to tease “A-har there, me hoyties!”

Top Ten Pickup lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day
(We came up with these in an effort to interest The Other Dave (Letterman) in TLAPD. His staff liked ’em, but alas, his show was”dark” the week of Sept. 19.)
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I’d love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How’d you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup line for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day is …
1. Prepare to be boarded.
Bonus pickup lines (when the ones above don’t work, as they often won’t)
They don’t call me Long John because my head is so big.
You’re drinking a Salty Dog? How’d you like to try the real thing?
Wanna shiver me timbers?
I’ve sailed the seven seas, and you’re the sleekest schooner I’ve ever sighted.
Brwaack! Polly want a cracker? … Oh, wait. That’s for Talk Like a PARROT Day.
That’s the finest pirate booty I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Let’s get together and haul some keel.
That’s some treasure chest you’ve got there.

Shocking news today.

Models are being banned in Spain for being too skinny. WHAT? Someone actually cares about what little girls see as “normal” body types? I can’t believe it.

Shrooms and MaryJane found on Willie Nelson’s tour bus? ANOTHER SHOCKER!

Parents abduct their pregnant daughter to force her to get an abortion. Now that’s EFFED UP!

It just goes to show that some people are getting it right, some people are in love with status quo, and others are so messed up that you can’t even explain them.

Last night I had a great idea for a blog entry

Last night when I was laying in bed, I had a great idea for a blog entry. Seriously, I was laying here and I thought, man, CanuckNicole, my little Wingnut, will be so happy to read that entry-it was one of those that she said always made her giggle because only I wrote that way. You know, one of those obscure, did you ever wonder/here comes insight from Stacie kind of entries. I was so excited about it. This morning, I remembered, but never had time to actually sit down and do anything about it (two kids and babysitting another four year old will do that to ya!). So here I am, sitting in bed wondering what the hell my damn insights were.
Its funny, I used to write down my insights anytime anywhere on anything. Now that I have a very small child attached to me, I don’t get a chance to write so much. I need to remedy that. Also, now that things are simmering down at home and we are getting into a kind of routine (you know how everything changes every week or so when you have a child under the age of one–just as you get used to one thing, they switch it up on you!), I want to start going back to Starbucks to see where all my peeps have gone.
Oh, I’m not talking about all my superbaristas who have moved on to other jobs (that would be a shout out to Big Mike and Devilman!), nor about my lovelyladybaristas who are still working there and making me fantabulous chai! I’m talking about those famous people like Liss’s Little Person, the woman previously known as the “vile Oriental woman” who chewed like a cow, but is now known as the “vile Asian woman” since my husband informed me that calling an Asian person Oriental is rude and should be reserved only for carpets (who knew?!), and of course, my Dallas Cowboys man. I mean, I need to see if these people are still showing up there and doing their normal daily routine. I’m sure there are a few new characters there waiting for me to document and share with the rest of you. The last time I was there, I had Piper with me, so the girls were oohing and ahhing over her, but there was one person who I could tell was now a regular. I realized I was out of the loop when one of the girls called him by name and started really having a conversation with him. I thought of you, my blog audience of millions, waiting and wondering when I would ever update you on my ‘Bucks people. I have let you down severely over the past few months. I realized that this man would make a wonderful entry on the Starbucks Slate, and that I need to research him more in depth. But to whet your whistle, let me tell you how I knew you would want to know about him…
He looked rather disheveled and had shorts on that screamed the 80’s. He looked perhaps late 40’s with wild light curly hair. I think he had a striped shirt on, or perhaps the 80’s shorts just made me THINK he had a striped shirt on, not sure…Anyway, when asked how he was doing, his response was “I haven’t slept in days!” THAT, my dear audience, was how I knew that this man was for you. Yes, indeed. Not sleeping for days? Oh, there’s GOT to be a story behind THAT one! Luckily for you, since they knew his name, he comes in there regularly. I have made it my mission to find out more about this one for you. Special present, isn’t it?
One more note before I go…Just so you know, there are a few normal people that spend time at my ‘Bucks. Two older men are there almost every single time I go and they are both friendly and rather normal…so far.

Just in case?

Ok, so if you saw this posted about your county, and let’s say your county is pretty multicultural, would you say there’s a bit of profiling going on? Especially if all of a sudden FIVE YEARS after terrorism became a household word, they are wanting the residents to be aware (but we swear there is nothing going on, honest!). Its craziness.

And why is it that profiling keeps coming up in my life today??

Technology has been driving me crazy lately

As per usual in our house, after hearing the bad news about Steve Irwin, we decided to go spend some money to try to make ourselves feel better. We went to The Great Indoors, which is an amazing place of home loveliness. (They are so grand that they even have a Starbucks inside!) We bought some new drinking glasses and a food processor. I’ve been wanting a food processor for months, and we finally broke down and bought one. Now I have to put it to use! LOL
After The Great Indoors, we went to Best Buy and I got an iPod shuffle to put audiobooks and music on for the kids. I was so excited to get it going when we got home, but of course, having two kids…well, I didn’t even get to open it until yesterday. So I spent all day yesterday trying to not only get the shuffle started for the kids, but to also update our family website, the Crazy Crawfords. Needlestosay, it was a frustrating day for me. Talk about craziness: the .mac servers were down and then I had errors upon errors trying to publish when they seemed to be working, AND my iTunes would recognize that the shuffle was connected, but wouldn’t add any of my songs to the actual shuffle. Finally, at 10:30 last night, I managed to get the shuffle working. And as of right now, some of the Crazy Crawfords website is updated and online. Some parts are having issues and I will have to deal with them, but right now, my brains are more like refried beans than technogeekyloveliness. Oi.
I know I shouldn’t complain, but I’m betting that you know how much fun it is when technology pokes fun at you…

Don’t usually talk about this kind of stuff, but…

Who knew Suri Cruise would be so pretty? (Insert jumping on a couch here.) If you haven’t seen her yet, here is a picture of her with her parents. Actually, Katie is looking pretty beautiful herself in that photo. I won’t even mention the other person in the photo.

I knew it all along

Those stingrays are scary stuff. Having been in the water with them for about two minutes before a panic attack hit me (serious stuff), I always said that its a freaky experience. I don’t trust animals, mostly because they can’t tell us when we are bothering them, they just have to show us. BUT, what could Steve Irwin have done to make a stingray attack? I mean, sure, he was an ‘in your face’ naturalist, but he always seemed to handle animals well. When I was in the water with rays, I was afraid that their barb would brush against me by accident more than an attack occurring. Its all just a shame. Steve Irwin will be missed dearly in the Crawford house.