Weigh anchor or I’ll give you a taste of the cap’n’s daughter!

Yes, that’s right! Today is Talk Like A Pirate Day! ARRR!!! So, ahoy there me hearties! Or as Liss likes to tease “A-har there, me hoyties!”

Top Ten Pickup lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day
(We came up with these in an effort to interest The Other Dave (Letterman) in TLAPD. His staff liked ‘em, but alas, his show was”dark” the week of Sept. 19.)
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I’d love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How’d you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup line for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day is …
1. Prepare to be boarded.
Bonus pickup lines (when the ones above don’t work, as they often won’t)
They don’t call me Long John because my head is so big.
You’re drinking a Salty Dog? How’d you like to try the real thing?
Wanna shiver me timbers?
I’ve sailed the seven seas, and you’re the sleekest schooner I’ve ever sighted.
Brwaack! Polly want a cracker? … Oh, wait. That’s for Talk Like a PARROT Day.
That’s the finest pirate booty I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Let’s get together and haul some keel.
That’s some treasure chest you’ve got there.

Shocking news today.

Models are being banned in Spain for being too skinny. WHAT? Someone actually cares about what little girls see as “normal” body types? I can’t believe it.

Shrooms and MaryJane found on Willie Nelson’s tour bus? ANOTHER SHOCKER!

Parents abduct their pregnant daughter to force her to get an abortion. Now that’s EFFED UP!

It just goes to show that some people are getting it right, some people are in love with status quo, and others are so messed up that you can’t even explain them.

Last night I had a great idea for a blog entry

Last night when I was laying in bed, I had a great idea for a blog entry. Seriously, I was laying here and I thought, man, CanuckNicole, my little Wingnut, will be so happy to read that entry-it was one of those that she said always made her giggle because only I wrote that way. You know, one of those obscure, did you ever wonder/here comes insight from Stacie kind of entries. I was so excited about it. This morning, I remembered, but never had time to actually sit down and do anything about it (two kids and babysitting another four year old will do that to ya!). So here I am, sitting in bed wondering what the hell my damn insights were.
Its funny, I used to write down my insights anytime anywhere on anything. Now that I have a very small child attached to me, I don’t get a chance to write so much. I need to remedy that. Also, now that things are simmering down at home and we are getting into a kind of routine (you know how everything changes every week or so when you have a child under the age of one–just as you get used to one thing, they switch it up on you!), I want to start going back to Starbucks to see where all my peeps have gone.
Oh, I’m not talking about all my superbaristas who have moved on to other jobs (that would be a shout out to Big Mike and Devilman!), nor about my lovelyladybaristas who are still working there and making me fantabulous chai! I’m talking about those famous people like Liss’s Little Person, the woman previously known as the “vile Oriental woman” who chewed like a cow, but is now known as the “vile Asian woman” since my husband informed me that calling an Asian person Oriental is rude and should be reserved only for carpets (who knew?!), and of course, my Dallas Cowboys man. I mean, I need to see if these people are still showing up there and doing their normal daily routine. I’m sure there are a few new characters there waiting for me to document and share with the rest of you. The last time I was there, I had Piper with me, so the girls were oohing and ahhing over her, but there was one person who I could tell was now a regular. I realized I was out of the loop when one of the girls called him by name and started really having a conversation with him. I thought of you, my blog audience of millions, waiting and wondering when I would ever update you on my ‘Bucks people. I have let you down severely over the past few months. I realized that this man would make a wonderful entry on the Starbucks Slate, and that I need to research him more in depth. But to whet your whistle, let me tell you how I knew you would want to know about him…
He looked rather disheveled and had shorts on that screamed the 80’s. He looked perhaps late 40’s with wild light curly hair. I think he had a striped shirt on, or perhaps the 80’s shorts just made me THINK he had a striped shirt on, not sure…Anyway, when asked how he was doing, his response was “I haven’t slept in days!” THAT, my dear audience, was how I knew that this man was for you. Yes, indeed. Not sleeping for days? Oh, there’s GOT to be a story behind THAT one! Luckily for you, since they knew his name, he comes in there regularly. I have made it my mission to find out more about this one for you. Special present, isn’t it?
One more note before I go…Just so you know, there are a few normal people that spend time at my ‘Bucks. Two older men are there almost every single time I go and they are both friendly and rather normal…so far.

Just in case?

Ok, so if you saw this posted about your county, and let’s say your county is pretty multicultural, would you say there’s a bit of profiling going on? Especially if all of a sudden FIVE YEARS after terrorism became a household word, they are wanting the residents to be aware (but we swear there is nothing going on, honest!). Its craziness.

And why is it that profiling keeps coming up in my life today??

Technology has been driving me crazy lately

As per usual in our house, after hearing the bad news about Steve Irwin, we decided to go spend some money to try to make ourselves feel better. We went to The Great Indoors, which is an amazing place of home loveliness. (They are so grand that they even have a Starbucks inside!) We bought some new drinking glasses and a food processor. I’ve been wanting a food processor for months, and we finally broke down and bought one. Now I have to put it to use! LOL
After The Great Indoors, we went to Best Buy and I got an iPod shuffle to put audiobooks and music on for the kids. I was so excited to get it going when we got home, but of course, having two kids…well, I didn’t even get to open it until yesterday. So I spent all day yesterday trying to not only get the shuffle started for the kids, but to also update our family website, the Crazy Crawfords. Needlestosay, it was a frustrating day for me. Talk about craziness: the .mac servers were down and then I had errors upon errors trying to publish when they seemed to be working, AND my iTunes would recognize that the shuffle was connected, but wouldn’t add any of my songs to the actual shuffle. Finally, at 10:30 last night, I managed to get the shuffle working. And as of right now, some of the Crazy Crawfords website is updated and online. Some parts are having issues and I will have to deal with them, but right now, my brains are more like refried beans than technogeekyloveliness. Oi.
I know I shouldn’t complain, but I’m betting that you know how much fun it is when technology pokes fun at you…

Don’t usually talk about this kind of stuff, but…

Who knew Suri Cruise would be so pretty? (Insert jumping on a couch here.) If you haven’t seen her yet, here is a picture of her with her parents. Actually, Katie is looking pretty beautiful herself in that photo. I won’t even mention the other person in the photo.

I knew it all along

Those stingrays are scary stuff. Having been in the water with them for about two minutes before a panic attack hit me (serious stuff), I always said that its a freaky experience. I don’t trust animals, mostly because they can’t tell us when we are bothering them, they just have to show us. BUT, what could Steve Irwin have done to make a stingray attack? I mean, sure, he was an ‘in your face’ naturalist, but he always seemed to handle animals well. When I was in the water with rays, I was afraid that their barb would brush against me by accident more than an attack occurring. Its all just a shame. Steve Irwin will be missed dearly in the Crawford house.

Its Race Your Mouse Around the Icons Day!

So I thought it would be a good day for an update over here. Obscure, I know, but still…
Life with two kids is fabulous. Seriously. Michael is adjusting well. The hardest part is having to keep telling him to be gentle. I feel bad about it. He just loves Piper so much, and he wants to hug her and love her and touch her all the time. Which is awesome. But when he hugs, he wants to hug her as hard as he hugs me and Steve, which is not so good. Michael is a real champ and is an amazing helper. He is always ready to get something for me if I’m nursing Piper, and he always wants to help in any way that he can. Piper is still in the sleeping, eating, pooping stage, so not too much can be said about her adjusting to life outside the womb. Nighttime is pretty good. She usually sleeps for about 3-4 hours at a time and when I go in to her, I’m usually back in bed within a half hour. Sounds like a long time, BUT with Michael I was always in there for at least an hour, so this seems like a walk in the park. I was nervous at first about her crying at night and whether or not it would wake up Michael since he is in the next room over, but guess what? He sleeps just as normal, which is fabulous. Bedtime is the time that is hardest of all the day. Trying to get Michael into bed and having Piper into bed, well, its hard. Michael wants me to lay with him for a few minutes and Piper wants to nurse. No matter what time we head up to bed, its always the same. I think Rowdy Roddy Piper plans it that way, to tell you the truth. Last night was perfect. While Steve was getting Michael ready for bed, I was nursing Piper. By the time they were reading stories, Piper was in her crib. Not asleep, but not crying. I managed to lay with Michael for ten minutes (a long time, by our standards) and we just chatted for a bit. It was nice to have some time just with my buddy. Pretty much as soon as I settled in for a snack downstairs, my presence was requested by the littlest peanut of the house. I didn’t really mind since I had gotten to spend time with Michael uninterrupted.
Ok, well, I’m off for now, gotta eat while I can, hehehe, but I leave you with a bit of entertainment: go check out this link (make sure you watch the whole thing):
http://gorillamask.net/extremewheelchair.shtml
PS To James: I’ve heard some stories about Texans….you know what they say about Southern hospitality, right? heheheh

She’s here!

Having issues blogging, will write more later.

Still pregnant, are you surprised?

I really had an hour last night when I thought to myself, “Self, this might be it!” Then I fell asleep and woke up another hour later with no pain left. What a bummer.
I did have my 40 week midwife appointment today (yes, my due date is August 12th-Saturday-but they have so many women due this week and next that they were actually doublebooking their appointments and this was the last one left!).
Today I got to meet with the director of the birthing center, Jan, who was so helpful during our last pregnancy and loss. She looked at me and said, “So what do you want to do? Are we inducing or waiting it out another week?” I nearly burst into tears while I told her all my thoughts from how bad I want to see that this little girl is ok to I don’t want to mess too much with nature (what if she’s NOT ready to come out for some strange reason??) to how much I am in pain to not wanting to ‘jinx’ anything by inducing. She said that based on all the info of this pregnancy that they have, this baby could go either way and be just fine. So, together, we decided that IF this baby doesn’t come by then, I will be induced next Thursday. So worse comes to worse, I only have one more week of this left.
We both laughed and said that now that I have my ‘walking papers’, she’ll probably decide to come on her own. I opted NOT to have an exam today to see if there was any changes, because I figure, it really doesn’t matter, right? Perhaps this will help get me going. In the meantime, I plan on walking more tonight as long as its not raining.
Ok, I just wanted to update you guys so you know what’s going down over here. I know you’re waiting with baited breath…LOL
Seriously, I wanted to say thanks for all the words of encouragement you guys have left here. You rock. I totally appreciate it!